Incoming! The Anxiety Bomb. It's difficult to tell whether this is an allergic reaction to seasonal change, a genre of mania inflamed by the warmth and bloom of springtime; or if this is a lack of faith in God's plan for me as my family faces great challenges. Or both. Again, even with the knowledge and acceptance of my illness, how do I balance treatment with growth of character? Seasons of life are meant to change us and improve the ground we stand on, so how much responsibility do I take for my debilitating fears? The balance eludes me at times. So, what now?
The only peace I find lies in my surrender. I must allow the great Force of nature to take hold and bring to fruition the means and ends of my existence. I must have faith in God to survive the chaos of mortality, in the hopes of a great inheritance. Lessons are painful but they bloom into wisdom, greater faith and even ultimate joy:
2 Corinthians 12:
9. Then he said unto me, My grace is sufficient for thee: for my strength is made perfect in weakness. Most gladly therefore will I rather glory in my infirmities, that the power of Christ may rest upon me.
10. Therefore, I take pleasure in infirmities, in reproaches, in necessities, in persecutions, in distresses for Christ's sake: for when I am weak, I am strong.